T-Minus 1 day - Buildings & the Master Builder

Only one more day before i terminate my Neoral (anti-rejection) drug intake. My skin crying out, never did it want to be reduced to an imflamed painful wreck like last time.
Two weeks. All it took was two weeks for the flesh to fail. To fall. But the mind and the heart chooses to ignore.

Doctors orders.

Can a man's being be in three pieces at once? The skin cries reactively. The mind braces the inevitable. The heart gathers up as much faith as possible as can be found within broken memories, fragments from past experiences... but i realize it will take more, adundantly more than that. Through their importunity at length the skin persuaded, the mind prepared himself to avoid the hidden odium cast upon him. By his own neighbour, his flesh, his own being...

Help. Anyone... just anyone...

If i said i wasn't apprehensive, i'd be bluffing. I could imagine a hero mutter an impenetrable resolve, a steely bravdo with a blazing white teeth (which is the color of NJC - not white, blazing white... erm... right...), but that is not me. I don't have blazing white teeth. Although many close ones have affirmed an amazing resiliency within me. Ironic. I never felt that way. I think they must have saw someone else. Maybe God? (Deafening applause within the silence of my heart)

A metaphor.

I remember how i used to spend quality time experiencing God when i was sitting next to the swimming pool. Bible open, heart pensive, head braced and re-braced to accept any change of schema God would have on me - i observed a metaphor opening up right in front of my eyes.
As i sat next to the rippling waves of the small swimming pool, i realized that i was surrounded. 15 floor high rises giants of concrete and glass towering over me, like the small fragile humanoid i was, who was i compared the massive solidity of mass around me? How often do we allow our problems to magnify themselves? Problems and pains... the world seems to whisper to you and beckon you, and at the moment of proximity shouts out hopelessness in your ear.
But my eyes could not help but to perceive the wonderous spectral light blazing around the high rises as reminder that there is something much bigger, more powerful, more massive... and uncannily more beautiful. The magnificant sky, that beholds the stars and sun beckons subtly and confidently behind the high-rises. Concrete and glass... backdropped by spectral lights, vast skies, the power of the wind and rain. Buildings and remnants will long pass away while the skies will acknowledge it's own eternity, so to speak.

Psalm 89:
8 O LORD God Almighty, who is like you? You are mighty, O LORD, and your faithfulness surrounds you. 9 You rule over the surging sea; when its waves mount up, you still them.

There are problems that are unimaginably big ... but there is a God that is unimaginably bigger than them. There are problems that surround you... but there is a God whose vastness surround everything. There are problems which work mechnically against you... there is a God that works lovingly, dynamically for you.

Psalm 61: 2
From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I.

Have we stood to closely to the wrong thing?

Even a coin, no matter how small it is, when placed in front of your eye, can block out the most magnificent sunset through mountain heights and crystal lakes...
but that coin will never change the fact that there is a magnificent sunset beyond the mountain height - they shine for you.

Do i have big fears? Yes.

But we focus our eyes not on the problem, but on the wondrous loving God. Pray with me. Pray along with me. Stand with me, stand along with me. We stand next to the Master Builder... bigger than the buildings that pretend to be.
...
"Death whispers words of defeat in my ear. My God, i draw near. My God i draw near."
John Reuben